act how you want to feel

i've been thinking a lot about happiness lately. possibly sparked by the book i am currently reading called the the happiness project.  no matter what sparked it though,  happiness is a concept  i often wonder about.  "how to be happy, how to stay happy, what makes me happy, why i don't feel happy, can i control my own happiness,  is happiness in life attainable?"  the author spends a year of her life tweaking her own happiness...asking these questions and others to really understand what brings her true happiness.  i like how she is working out the things she can eliminate that don't bring happiness to her life, yet balancing the things that do.  she has some useful ideas and some not so useful to me in my life, but still i am enjoying the book and the challenge it poses to find those things in my life that truly bring happiness.

one saying from the book that i have really taken to heart over the past few days is:  act how you want to feel.  so often i let my emotions dictate the kind of day i am going to have, or the way i am going to treat myself and others around me.  this kind of behavior most often leaves me feeling disappointed and guilty! for instance, the other day i was feeling pretty depressed.  i was grumpy, weepy, anxious, feeling lonely, etc.  i knew that this was mostly sparked by those lovely "pms hormones" and would most likely be gone in a few days.  however, those closest to me seem to suffer until ashley can get her head screwed on straight again. luckily,  i remembered the quote i had recently read(which i also wrote on a dry erase board to remind myself), and i "girded up my loins" and put on a happy face and tried my darndest to act how i wanted to feel: HAPPY!  you know what, it worked pretty well.  i felt more aware of my tone and my responses.  i did have a few slip ups, but i've continued to strive to "act happy" and just the reminder alone in my mind has helped me to feel more positive and outgoing with my happy behavior.

happy day for me and for my sweet family and friends who have to deal with my mental instability every 3 weeks or so....